Hello, How are you?

Wow! It's been a LONG time since I last wrote here. With traveling to M last week, I mostly journaled in the hand written form and that felt really good. But then, I felt like something was missing! Well, aside from that being my boyfriend, it was also you, dear blog of mine. I missed you.

What's on my mind? A LOT.

Am I able to relocate and keep my job? If I can relocate, where am I allowed to go? Then my salary will be adjusted to the cost of living in that area. But then what if I can only go to AR? C said it's not worth living there and I would be happier staying in Cali. But I want to be with him. I heart sings when I am with him. He is my world.

I fell more deeper in love with him while I was in M. He was so loving and gave me so much attention. He broke his toe but I tried to help and I think he was grateful. C acts and thinks fast. I think I used to slow him down when we lived in O. But that can be a good thing. I though he was the 'slow' one in the relationship, but I think I just needed to change my perspective. He moved quickly while I was there! It was so fun an exhilirating. I felt so many feels.

Anyway, now I'm back in SL. I'm trying to get back into the routine I was in before I went to M. But I feel different, changed. In a good way but also in a way that makes it hard to re-accept my current status quo. My life here in Cali. My eyes are different. My heart is different. I ache more for C. I haven't felt like this for a guy in so so long. I feel passion. And I feel angst. This is what long distance feels like. It kinda hurts.