New Year's Eve

As I sit in Peet's on Lakeshore on New Year's Eve, I can't help but be a little reflective, a little sentimental.

It's been a tough year full of isolation and quarantine as it was our second year under shelter in place during the pandemic, but I am safe, healthy, and happy. I have a roof over my head, food on my table, and friends that are like family. My life is no where near perfect, but what is really perfect in this world anyway? And if it is perfect, is it worth the price of perfection?

Like a diamond in the rough, my life has withstood pressure; my relationship with Chris has withstood the test of time. I may not be able to wake up next him these days, as our relationship is long distance, but I still am so in love with him. He is my heart. He is my light.

Though my circle of friends has gotten smaller, it's closer, tighter, and full of greater connection. I feel more aligned with my current friends - they are more than just drinking buddies - and I feel more understood, more seen.

My mental illness has gone to the wayside. My mental health is the strongest it has ever been. I have less symptoms overall, and my life has a sense of "normalcy" to it. There is stability, there is routine, and there is balance. My thoughts are logical and at times whimsical. I'm seeing myself for who I really am, who I always wanted to be and it feels good.

I'm not sure what resolutions I should make for 2022 when I have already undergone so many changes in the last 2 years. But I'll give it a shot and make a list anyway:

-I want to eat a more plant-based diet. More fruits and vegetables in each meal, and I will study the Pegan Diet. 

-I want to lose 5-10 more pounds this next year. This will take exercising 4-6 times a week on a regular basis, eating clean, and doing intermittent fasting with no eating past 6:30 pm. I will eat around 8:30 am, 12 pm, and 5 pm each day. But I will not put too much pressure on my nutrition habits as I'm healing from an ED. I have come a long way, and I wish to follow a more an intuitive eating habit overall. And I like that my nutrition is a work in progress, something that changes a little each day, each month, each year. I love researching healthy recipes, I love talking about food, and I love to eat!

-Work smarter (not harder) at my current job. I have been at my job for 8 months and I want to stay with it as long as I can. That means I need to become a better editor/proofreader. It's not impossible and I need to refer to my proofreading checklist that I created every time I take on a new communication. But I will also apply to new Communications Manager roles, just in case.

-Save money to adopt my future child. I will need a total of 45K in order to adopt my first child. I will also need to live in a 2-bedroom apartment. So I need to be smart with my money and not spend too much. Ross also gives its employees 5K towards adoption fees.

-Partake in self care. That means meditating regularly, taking baths, doing face masks, following a skincare routine, getting the occasional massage, and journaling and creating writing.

-I want to become a stronger creative writer. Work on editing my novellette with Youssef and write more regularly. That means not going out on weekends and staying in or going to this same Peet's to write.

These are not just resolutions, but healthy habits that I want to work on, partake in, and improve upon.

2022, I'm coming for ya!